That Ever Present Blue Light

by LxL CRxWBAR

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1.	I'm waiting on the good times now, he said, and it really stuck with me in an odd way 03:23	buy track
2.	There's places in my life where I wish I could go back and fix everything I've done wrong 04:27	buy track
3.	Smiling while listening to sad music. (This happens a lot actually) 01:01	buy track
4.	It feels like I've been drowning, after struggling to stay afloat 04:08	buy track
5.	She's still in my dreams, never fading, never faltering 05:07	buy track
6.	Some times it feels as if it's all I have to look forward to... 02:26	buy track
7.	Unwanted and left alone for the world to destroy (fading away ever so slowly) 04:31	buy track
8.	I devised a plan to leave everything behind and leave this world for good 03:57	buy track
9.	; 02:11	buy track

about

How does one even write this kind of note?
They don’t teach you that in my English class.
All I know is that this is my last quote.
I guess this work will be my very last.

I am just done with living with the pain,
Of failure, dead dreams, fights that are in vain.
Of sadness, sorrow that just never wanes.
I am just done with living in these chains.

Goodbye, I’m sorry to those that loved me.
Goodbye, I just did not have it in me...

My love, I wish we had one final kiss.
My love, I wish it didn’t end like this.

How does one even end this kind of note?
If only I had just first thought this through.
If only I had used some profound quote...
To all: I’m sorry. To Her: I love you.

credits

released December 10, 2020

extra help from: Caleb Delos Santos (Poem), Trey Dickerson (;), Ciaran Kempner (Cover)

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LxL CRxWBAR Los Angeles, California

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